Updated: Jul 5, 2019
If you have been following me since March 1st you know a little bit about my story and that I had a radical hysterectomy at the age of 33 which MENOPAUSE. For two years I worked with my doctor on a plan to preserve my ability to have children however, in 2014 that dream came to a drastic holt and it broke me.
May is Mental Health Awareness Month I actually did a video about this, but I wanted to do a blog post because I’m not sure if I covered everything Menopause normally happens to women of a certain age so when you are in your twenties (maybe teens) and early thirties it’s typically unheard of and there is a lot we have to get used to. Some people may think, “its menopause what do you have to get used to, it’s not so bad.” I created Millennial In Menopause because for a good majority of us we really didn't want this drastic measure and many of us are in our childbearing years and don't have children, this also hurts the woman who may have other children and she is married and wants more. Know that menopause is not the same for every woman in general, but a woman who has a radical hysterectomy it’s different she goes into what is called Surgically Induced Menopause. After the surgery the body immediately, beings to show the symptoms of menopause typically Hot Flashes.
It wasn’t until I had gotten home and finished up with my pain medications that I realized the insomnia, in fact I really didn’t know about menopause much expect for the hot flashes so one night at 3am I decided to look up radical hysterectomy symptoms and boom there it was. Just to back track a bit I had a hard time in the hospital with my surgery I will go into more detail in my book, but just know part of it was the fact that I had a hysterectomy. From 2014 to now I experienced depression because of my inability to have children it was hard for me to come to this realization, I was angry with myself for not trying harder to find a doctor, I was mad at the doctors who saw me and told me I was fine that birth control would solve my problems, I was mad at the ones who didn’t believe me. I was upset that God would do this to me knowing that I desired to have children. One day I had really started feeling bad I had rage and hurt in my heart I stopped speaking to my co-workers I would come home and cry myself to sleep, it was then that I said I need to find a therapist.
Have you ever heard of the saying that doctors make the worst patients because they know everything, so they will try to treat themselves? Well, add therapists to that list. I have a Master’s Degree in Christian Mental Health Counseling and I just knew that I could counsel myself, Yeah so that didn’t work. Ladies I think that all women who have had a hysterectomy of any form to seek therapy, I also think that if you are going through reproductive health challenges you should go to therapy as well.
Benefits of Therapy:
You have someone to talk to about anything you are feeling. I know you may have friends and family, but they are not trained in helping people deal with trauma and grief.
They help you establish coping techniques that you can practice daily.
They validate your feelings and help you work through them. The first time I told my therapist I can’t do baby showers and it hurts to be around children, she told me “that’s understandable and it’s okay, you’re not crazy you’re grieving, and we will walk through this process at your pace.”
You will be better at communicating your feelings.
You will be able to recognize your triggers and process your feelings before they escalate into a breakdown (this is not instant it is something that takes time in the therapeutic process).
You have an hour appointment all about you, you absolutely cannot beat that.
Ladies we’ve spent so much time and energy at the doctor’s office getting treatments for our disrespectful uterus that we failed to realize just how much of a mental strain it is or has caused us. Please take care of all of you and seek professional therapeutic help, Check out my video below.